TYWA 2020 Nomination for The Read-Worthy Prize Grace
14 - THE DAY FIRE RAMPAGED
Favour Grace Alioke lives in Mowe, Ogun (18 years old). This story was slightly edited for grammatical accuracy and to better serve TGF readers. The originality of the story is 100% intact.
The sun was standing still like the policeman at Ayikara junction, making your clothes wet with your sweats as Haija was weaving your hair into six backward cornrows. Mama Halima ran into your compound, shouting, "Wuta! Wuta! Wuta tana ko'ina o! Fire! Fire! Fire is already everywhere o!"
Maybe you would not have believed it if you didn't see people running helter-skelter, some clustering into one another, some pushing others away; if you didn't stretch and see fire tearing down a building.
You jumped, as if frightened by a ghost, clasped your two-months old baby that was crawling on the floor, and started running too. You didn't even look back to check for Haija or Mama Halima, you just kept going where your legs were leading you, or perhaps, where the crowd was going.
Some bodies were already blazing, some were on the floor, unable to stand up, but who cared about them when everyone's life was in their frail and shaking hands?
Dust and smoke swirled into the air and mixed with everybody's daze and blurred your sight, but your legs were still moving. How would you surrender yours and baby's life to death?
You kept running and running till someone, probably, people, pushed you and you landed on the floor, inhaling dust and smoke. You screamed and struggled but the indistinct chatters swallowed your voice and your baby's cry.
You screamed again but someone stepped on you as he or she was running. A short hiss escaped your mouth. The dust started filling your nostrils and mouth. The crowd had already made you their foot mat. A drop of blood fell from your mouth when you coughed and everything started becoming black, but your baby's cry was still tingling your ear.
You opened your eyes and a fair lady in a knee-length white gown and nurse cap smiled at you. You looked sideways and saw injured people on the hospital beds. You tried raising your arms but pains clutched it to the bed and drip.
After the nurse adjusted the drip and helped you in sitting up, because you insisted on sitting up, you asked her what had happened and she told you some armed Fulani men attacked your village, Kimbori, and Apiashyim for an unknown reason.
You asked after your daughter and the smile on her face faded. She pouted and wagged her head.
Review: This would give you goosebumps or keep your eyes frozen as you read. It is intriguing and insightful! -TGF team.
Ensure you VOTE below if you want Grace to win the Read-Worthy Prize, TYWA 2020.
Beautiful piece
ReplyDeleteThank you.
Deleteu're welcome
DeleteYou are doing well.
ReplyDelete😍 .Thanks.
DeleteSo sad. Beautiful piece in few words. Weldone, Grace❤
ReplyDeleteYea. Thank you .
DeleteNice one dear
ReplyDeleteThank you .
DeleteKeep it up
ReplyDeleteGreat job more power to ur elbow
ReplyDeleteAnd power to my writing. 😍. Thanks.
DeleteMore ink to your pen also babe
Delete😊😊. Amen. Thank you.
DeleteI love all your pieces Grace. This one definitely stands out. Keep winning
ReplyDeleteI'm grateful, ma'am.
DeleteYeah, it stands out, keep it up Gracie
Delete😘😘😍😍
DeleteYou have consistently proved your prowess’ excellence. This is a beautiful piece Grace, I’m proud of you.
ReplyDeleteGreat!
DeleteThanks, sir.
A great piece indeed
DeleteExactly oo. I got glued to the end. Grace is doing well.
DeleteThanks so much, ma.
DeleteI love the story. It captivates my mind.
ReplyDeleteMore grease, Grace
Thank you.
DeleteIt's really captivating
Delete😊😊. 🤗🤗
DeleteA very interesting read.
ReplyDeleteGood. 😍
DeleteBeyond just reading the words, my mind was active. I could paint the picture of what you were trying to pass across through your deliberate words, despite that I still wanted to read the end. You have my thumbs up ma.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful!
DeleteI'm grateful, ma'am.
😍
DeleteThis is really nice. I was literarily in the piece.
ReplyDeleteWow!
DeleteThanks.
DeleteAwesome piece, you are doing well Grace
ReplyDelete😍 . Thank you.
DeleteAwesome love it ❤️
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you love it. Thank you.
DeleteI love it nice one
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteIts lovely
ReplyDeleteI'm glad it is. Thanks.
DeleteBeautiful piece dear.
ReplyDelete😍. Thanks, ma'am.
Delete😍😍
DeleteAmazing!!! Kudos.
ReplyDeleteThanks.
DeleteGood job Grace.
ReplyDeleteThanks.
DeleteWonderful job grace
ReplyDeleteI love this piece, its so beautiful
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work
Thank you.
DeleteTruly, it is. Keep writing dear.
DeleteThanks so much, ma'am.
DeleteWell done grace for this great job
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteThe story is really a job well done👍
DeleteThank you.
DeleteWonderful Piece.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteNicely done
ReplyDeleteThanks.
DeleteVery good
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteGreat job
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteThis is beautiful, Grace.
ReplyDeleteI'm happy it is. Thank you.
DeleteThis is amazing.
ReplyDeleteI love how you used the figurative language; it kept glued to the end.
Excellent work Grace.
Really amazing indeed😍
Delete❤❤
DeleteWell done Grace. More wisdom and grace to you in Jesus' Name!
ReplyDeleteAmen. Thank you.
DeleteA very vivid detailed account of events. Keeps your imagination active
ReplyDeleteYes!
DeleteNice..You are doing well
ReplyDelete😍 . Thank you.
DeleteOh my! How I wish she did not lose her babe.
ReplyDeleteWell done Gracie! You won my heart 😍
So sad. Many mothers do.
DeleteThank you so much. I do not take this for granted.
❤❤
DeleteThe piece is alive!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you found it alive. Thanks.
DeleteVery true
Delete😍😍
DeleteNice one grace, keep it up
ReplyDeleteThank you .
DeleteLovely story Grace. You surprised me. Keep it up
ReplyDeleteThank you so much.
DeleteReading this story over and over again, keeps making more sense to me. You did really well sis
ReplyDeleteVery true
DeleteI'm glad you both found it living. Thanks so much.
DeleteYou're welcome
DeleteOne can literally feel life in the story, good work dear.
ReplyDelete😊😊. Thanks.
DeleteGracey!
ReplyDeleteYou've grown so much...
Such a beautiful piece..
Yes o
Delete😍😍😍😍😍. Growth! Growth! Growth! I'm happy for growth. Thanks so much both of you.
DeleteAmazing writeup dear
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteYeah, keep aiming high
Delete🤗🤗❤❤
DeleteNice one
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteAwesome!!
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteWonderful piece.
ReplyDeleteKeep the fire burning.
Congratulations already.
The fire in the story? 😅😅.
DeleteThank you.
I see Chimamanda everywhere in this short story. It's so descriptive and intriguing. A great work dear.
ReplyDeleteI've been Chimamandalised. 😅😅😅.
DeleteThanks so much.
Yes o, Chimamanda of this age😘
Delete😄😄. Thank you.
Deleteit really amazing
ReplyDeletekeep it up dear
👍
DeleteThanks so much.
DeleteGloria!!
This is so touching... It captivate me
ReplyDeleteMore grace...
Really captivating
DeleteIm glad it captivated you. Thanks.
DeleteGloria?!
Good job
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteMore power to your elbow
ReplyDeleteAmen. Thank you.
DeleteBeautiful piece...
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteGood job😌😌
ReplyDeleteThank you.
Delete��
ReplyDelete😅😅. Question ?
DeleteOh. It's supposed to be a sticker, right?
DeleteNice piece, it is really amazing
ReplyDeleteThank you, Temitope.
DeleteNice write up, keep it up
ReplyDeleteHopey, ese o
DeleteThank you so much, Hope and Gloria.
DeleteVery creative
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteThis is beautiful
ReplyDelete😍😍. Thank you.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful.
ReplyDeleteYou do much more, Grace!
Amen.
DeleteThank you so much.
Nice one
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteThis is a job well done. Keep it up, Grace.
ReplyDeleteThanks, sir.
DeleteNice piece, well done.
ReplyDeleteThanks.
DeleteInteresting story and sad at the same time.....keep it up....
ReplyDeleteYea. Thank you.
DeleteInteresting Piece... I love the way the writer exposed the death of the protagonist's child in the most subtle way.
ReplyDelete😊😊😊. Thank you.
Delete😊😊😊. I'm happy. Thank you.
Delete😊😊😊. I'm happy. Thank you.
Delete😊😊😊. Thank you.
Delete😊😊😊. Thank you!
Delete😊😊. Thank you!
DeleteGreat! Thank you, Techsmart.
DeleteWasn't expecting a sad ending honestly, this tells you the writers' ability to surprise...
ReplyDeleteYes! Thank you.
DeleteYes! Thank you.
DeleteReally Creative!
ReplyDeleteWas held till the end
I'm glad you were.
DeleteGreat write... It's original
ReplyDeleteI can't believe she lost her baby
ReplyDeleteLove the suspense!
ReplyDeleteStrong voice, Interesting plot... A great read!
ReplyDeleteThis is a great work, Grace. I love the way you glued me to the end. And please, next time, write happy stories. 😀😀
ReplyDeleteIt's amazing how you made me to quietly read every word of the story with rapt attention. Nice work 👌
ReplyDeleteNice piece by Grace
ReplyDeleteGrace, finally unleash the God given potential in her and also propel me to do more hard work in writing. Thanks for the encouragement and the piece... This worthy reading and enlightening
ReplyDeleteNice piece
ReplyDeleteam inspired keep it up sis��
I love the way you glued me to the end. Keep it up, Gracey.
ReplyDeleteGreat work here, Grace.
ReplyDeleteI'm very proud of you, Grace! Your consistency has proven to be the key to mastery. Keep it up!
ReplyDeleteGood work! Keep writing.
ReplyDeletekeep it up
ReplyDeleteNice 1 keep it up
ReplyDeleteWhat a nice write up keep up the good work
ReplyDeleteGood job Grace, nice write up
ReplyDeleteHmm. This story is just making me sigh. Sad story, but beautiful weaving of words.
ReplyDeleteIt's really nice.
ReplyDeleteGreat story. Keep it up.
ReplyDeleteSad but interesting story. Keep it up.
ReplyDeleteGreat story keep it up
ReplyDeleteShit! Shit! She lost the baby! Nooooo! I can't believe this.��������������������. Arrrggh!
ReplyDeleteGood plot. Good storyline, though I don't like how the baby died.
This is a work well done, Grace.
ReplyDeleteGreat work.
ReplyDeleteThe world will read you, Grace. YoureY a writer with great potential.
ReplyDeleteWow! Grace, comman teach me how to write naaww. Lol.
ReplyDeleteNice work here.
Sad. Sad. Sad. But I like how you made it interesting.
ReplyDeleteThis is why I am against Biafra. It will just increase loss and sadness. People need to read this and come off the notion of Biafra. It will create more loss.
ReplyDeleteForget my story. Lol. Great work here. Write more! I can't wait to read you again. And please don't forget us when you blow.
����������������. Good one.
ReplyDeleteWhat the person above said is true. There should be no Biafra. Ehnic hatred should be stopped. It will prevent unnecessary loss(es).
ReplyDeleteInteresting story, Grace. You are doing well.
ReplyDeleteI agree with what the notion of no-Biafra, but I think we should focus on tjis story, not Biafra.
Hey up there,I commented on Grace's work. Did you read it well?
ReplyDeleteThe loss made me remember Biafra so I don't think talking about Biafra is bad.
Hey there, I never said itsi bad. My statement read simple: "Focus on the story"! Please, don't conclude if you don't understand someone's point. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteHey up there, you must be a funny and angry person at the same time. Lol.
ReplyDeleteNever meant to argue, Grace. I remain that good boy. ����
Good boy indeed. I see it in you. I laugh in Spanish.
ReplyDeleteThis is just a real story. I love the way you added emotions.
ReplyDeleteGrace, you need to be read the more. You don't just write, you write fire. Keep writing Abba's heart.
ReplyDelete